Thursday, March 24, 2011

simple #6

Alone on a train aimlessly wander
Outdated map crumpled in my pocket
but I didn’t care were I was going
They’re all different names for the same place
Coasts dissapear when the sea drowns the sun
I’ve no words to share with anyone
Boundaries of language quietly curse
All different names for the same thing
There are different names for the same thing

Death Cab for Cutie- Different names for the same thing

Sunday, March 6, 2011

monologue

Every matter comes to you... I know it's not that easy to go through.. but you are still alive until now.. nothing happen but stronger, right?
Did you have same problem every day, month, year? Nope! They were different! and you passed it all those things.
And now.. again.. it's just another mountain.
Different mountain.. but exactly with the same climber.. you!
masalahnya beda... tapi lo nya kan tetep lo..

and never ever think that you are the most suffering people in the world..
all those starving people will look at you as a hot yummy turkey and ready to cut off your flesh into pieces...

but maybe you'll say that...
....that's different with my condition and situation now..
alright then..

whatever it is..
you must believe that you'll never walk alone.
when no one there.. Allah will always besides you even closer from your vein.
when you need love from your someone, friend, family....
Heiii... Allah has timessss bigger even than what your mother has, you know? He's the best!
Allah will give you way out when others do nothing but just listening.
Allah will run to you even when you just come by walking.
Allah will send someone to give free shoulders or a warm hug or a crispy joke to wipe your tears away..
Allah has His own way to make you "go home" ... come close to His hand..
He knows that you just a bit miss Him, don't you?

and don't you ever think?
world is so so big...
people are more than many..
but why it happen to you?
why must be you?
are you special enough to be the chosen one?

don't you ever think?
maybe it's just because Allah doesn't believe people unless you..
Allah believes that only you who are able to go through this such kind of trouble..
Allah just believe it to you...
And how come you just put that trust aside while you are the chosen one?

but sometimes maybe you say that... I'm not as strong as what others think..
but Allah knows you more than you know yourself, doesn't He?

If Allah trust you, then how come you don't trust yourself, Han?

dad..

If I have to apologize to any people in this world..
believe me you will be the one I'll first come to..
sorry dad..
for never call you unless if I need some extra money..
sorry for never ask any question unless a crunchy "how are you?" before my begging words of extra money after that..
sorry for never share anything about my life, or even how much I score in every my semester...
sorry for any loneliness that may come in each of your day...
sorry for my only yes or no in every question to start conversation to me..
sorry for can't be as nice as other daughters of others dad..
sorry for any decision I made without asking any suggestion of yours..
sorry for run only to mom for everything.. everything..

but you should know how much I care about you..
I just can't say it dad...

simple #4


hey dad... how are you?